12 weeks 5 days

I had my ultrasound today and that is what the baby is measuring! I have tons of great news today! So much to share!!! First off, let me just show you pictures of my beautiful, bouncy healthy baby!

The ultrasound couldn't have gone better! Baby was measuring at almost 13 weeks, everything looked great! Nuchal fluid measured normal, nasal bone was visable, saw normal brain development, organs, stomach, feet, hands! Baby was kicking, bouncing, and restless!! It all looked like a dream! Then we got the blood results and they came back at 1 and 10,000 chance of having a chromosome abnormality! Amazing news!!! ALLSOOOOOO........it's a GIRLLLLLLL!!!!!! We are having a little girl!!!!! I am overwhelmed with joy! I need to constantly pinch myself to believe this is all actually real. But yes, things are real and things are progressing wonderfully!

Now to bring myself back down to earth a bit. I am still having to remain very cautiously optimistic here. We are by no means out of the woods. We have a very long road ahead of us. I still have inflammation issues that hopefully the hydroxychloroquine will help keep at bay. They are monitoring me like a hawk. I cannot and will not breathe a complete sigh of relief until this baby is in my arms. Until then I must remain grounded and keep myself leveled here. 

But today, today is wonderful and I am so excited to share it here. It's been such a long journey and to see it come this far, well there are simply no words. I just pray it continues and I will finally get to hold this little rainbow soon. 

<3 <3 <3 

July 21st

Well - I got the call from the schedule coordinator for the Endometriosis surgery and turns out, they got me in for July 21st! Which means, this will get done before my next period - which means, we can possibly try again in August!! It's great and terrible timing all in one - because that is the week my sister and her family are coming to visit! But, she understands and we just have to throw a quick surgery into the plans. lol

  It will be interesting what they find out. It's good both ways I guess. It's good if I do have endo - because that may give me a reason for my high tnfa and perhaps control it. But it's good if I don't have it - because, well, yay I don't have endo! One less thing! lol. So either way, I am going to be ok. I will either treat it, or I won't have to worry about it.

Thing that sucks is - if I don't have it - then bring on the expensive drugs. Yikes. Not looking forward to that expense. I will retest my TNFa a week or so after my surgery to see if that made any effect. Wish I could wait a bit longer to retest - but my period will be coming shortly after so I need this all squared away so I can prep for August. What a fiasco I tell ya. Everyday it's something different. A bumpy, twirly, up and down roller coaster that doesn't seem to end.

Well, let's see what they discover...stay tuned...

Follow up

I had a followup with my doctor today regarding the results. It seems my NKCells look decent - but TNFa is 41.5 (which I had it wrong by typing 45.7 in the last post). Regardless, still high. My AMH levels came back a little weird too. They came back at 10.45 which is really high for someone my age. The last time I got tested for AMH last year in Sept it was 3.71 which is normal...so I have no clue how or why it bounced to 10.45! But from what I read - it could be an indicator of PCOS. Which I haven't been diagnosed with ever and don't think I have. I have regular periods, and ovulate regularly. So it's a little weird to me. My doctor thought it was an excellent number - which made me scratch my head since I am 37 with an AMH that bounced to a number that perhaps an early teenager would have. I am sure my doctor is sick of my constantly questioning things - but I don't care. This is my body and if I want to know more - or have more questions...I'm going to ask. I am not shy and the way I see it - is she is working for me. I am paying for her services. So I don't care if I am a bug-a-boo when it comes to my health.

  Anyway, my doctor. That is another story. I like her, she is really nice...but sometimes I feel that she isn't that clued in. There is this drug that is commonly used in the UK that has proven to help bring down TNFa significantly. And I asked her about it at my appt today. She heard of it but never used it or prescribed it before. So when I got back to work - I saw that it is avail in the US and the price of it isn't that much. I wrote to her to see if it's something we could try and she shot it down. Stating that she was unfamiliar with it and doesn't want to prescribe something she is unfamiliar with. Ok, that's respectable. I get that. BUT. Here is my issue. If something is commonly used amongst reproductive immunologists around the globe and has proven to work - and it's available here. Wouldn't you, as a doctor, do some research on the drug. Find out more about it and perhaps see if it could be helpful to your practice? She just shot it down because she didn't know much about it. But this could be a cure for me! LEARN about it - and then if you feel it's too risky - deny it. But don't just shut it down and remain naive.

Ugh. It's really frustrating when I am doing basically homework to figure all of this out for myself, but I can only go so far with it because another person who could help - doesn't care to do any research to help. Sometimes I wish I could find a new Dr. but there are very few in the area - and I don't want to go down another long twisted road when I have already gone so far with this one.

Anyway, so I have to now go to a consultation tomorrow with a Dr. to discuss Endometriosis laproscopy. I am nervous for that. I don't feel comfortable with someone poking around in that area. But I guess it needs to be done so I will do what I have to do. So we will see how long it will take for me to even get an appt for the procedure. Shit, the consultation took 3 weeks to get! Very annoying.

So July clearly is a bust for trying again. Doubt August will be in the cards too if I don't get this surgery done right away. But I am glad that perhaps I am doing something to maybe nip this TNFa shit in the ass. Because if this can cure it - everything else should be quick to follow. But if it's not the issue...I am up a long hill battle. I will post more tomorrow when I wrap up with the Dr.

Stay tuned...