I am a researcher by nature. I just want to learn every single thing about a topic I am interested in. So naturally when I began this journey - along with my hardships through this journey - I researched every single aspect of pregnancy. I swear I could write a damn book! But sometimes that research is not such a good thing.
The internet is an amazing source of information. Type in anything and everything is at your fingertips! But type in a simple symptom, experience, question - and you get the worst of the worst stories. They make you paranoid. They legit turn you into a hypochondriac! Lately, I have stumbled upon some terrible stories and statistics regarding stillbirth or death of the mother after birth. It's just horrible and has been a cause of many disturbing, sleepless nights for me.
I can't imagine coming all of this way, getting to the finish line - only to leave empty handed. My heart absolutely gets torn in half for those women, or men for that matter, who have dealt with that. It's so awful and there are no words. It has turned me into such a nervous wreck about labor and delivery! I want everything to go perfect, I mean who doesn't? But it's just so unsettling to know that it could all change in an instant! You can just never be comfortable at any point.
Anyway, moral of this post is - I have got to stop reading this stuff. I have got to keep my internet research to the bare minimum these days or I am going to drive myself crazy! I have to hang in there for another 8-10 weeks. I can do this! I just have to keep my mind in a positive place and stop feeding into the horror stories that circulate the web.
I advise everyone to do the same. It does nothing but make you stressed and worry. There is nothing wrong with being informed and prepared - but it's quite another to let that knowledge get the best of you - as I am doing. So from here on out - only positive stuff!!
Hope everyone has a happy and safe Memorial Day weekend!!
xo
Friday, May 26, 2017
Wednesday, May 24, 2017
30 Weeks!
I am officially in the 30's!! Crazy how time is flying! I have about 10 weeks left if she decides to stick in there until the bitter end! I hope so, but they can be unpredictable at this stage. My friends water broke at 37 weeks! So who knows...but so far things are still progressing nicely. I am starting to feel her roll around and poke her little feet/hands out. It's such a weird feeling. I gently poke back and she seems to like that game.
My next Dr. appt is on Tues after memorial day. It's just a routine appt, blood pressure, pee in a cup, monitor heart beat deal. My next fetal medicine ultrasound isn't until 35 weeks, so we have a little wait for that. I am planning on weaning off the prednisone here soon. I will finish this week out with the 5mg and then next will taper down to 2.5. At this stage, I just really feel I don't really need it anymore. I am also going to go off hydroxychloroquine soon. Probably after 32 weeks. I just want to start minimizing as much as I can so when I breast feed - there won't be much flowing between me and her directly. Hydroxy stays in your system for like 50 days - but they say it isn't harmful for breastfeeding. So I am not too worried. It will definitely be nice to be off the steroids though!
Other than that - pretty standard pregnancy symptoms going on. My fatigue is back with a bang. I have no energy anymore. I'm sure that is partially due to the fact that I barely sleep at night as well. When I am not pee'ing every hour - I am tossing and turning. So needless to say, I'm tired. Acid reflux is my enemy. It's brutttalll. I am trying not to OD on Zantec or Tums but man, it's hard! I can't eat anything anymore without it coming back and burning my throat. Ready for that to be over with. My feet...my poor, poor feet. They are taking the brunt of it all - along with my knees. It hurts to walk. But I just bought some new Toms so I am hoping that will help a bit. They are very comfortable.
But I am embracing everything the best I can as I reach the final stretch with this pregnancy. I admire all women that have gone through this multiple times. I can honestly say, one time is plenty for me! haha! We have decided after all of this that if we were to have one...it would just be a singleton. Yeah I am not doing this again. haha! As I am further along though, it's become so much more real. Especially when I feel her little feet, and her moving around. It's very surreal. It's very weird. And it's very, very emotional for me. Because I cannot believe in just 10 short weeks or less, I will finally be able to hold her in my arms and my journey will finally be over as a new one begins. But every day is still a day by day mentality. I am optimistic to think that way, but I remain grounded. Pregnancy is a tricky beast and can throw you curve balls at any given time. So I am counting my blessings that I have made it this far, and I am hopeful we will reach the finish line without hiccups. Fingers crossed!
xo
My next Dr. appt is on Tues after memorial day. It's just a routine appt, blood pressure, pee in a cup, monitor heart beat deal. My next fetal medicine ultrasound isn't until 35 weeks, so we have a little wait for that. I am planning on weaning off the prednisone here soon. I will finish this week out with the 5mg and then next will taper down to 2.5. At this stage, I just really feel I don't really need it anymore. I am also going to go off hydroxychloroquine soon. Probably after 32 weeks. I just want to start minimizing as much as I can so when I breast feed - there won't be much flowing between me and her directly. Hydroxy stays in your system for like 50 days - but they say it isn't harmful for breastfeeding. So I am not too worried. It will definitely be nice to be off the steroids though!
Other than that - pretty standard pregnancy symptoms going on. My fatigue is back with a bang. I have no energy anymore. I'm sure that is partially due to the fact that I barely sleep at night as well. When I am not pee'ing every hour - I am tossing and turning. So needless to say, I'm tired. Acid reflux is my enemy. It's brutttalll. I am trying not to OD on Zantec or Tums but man, it's hard! I can't eat anything anymore without it coming back and burning my throat. Ready for that to be over with. My feet...my poor, poor feet. They are taking the brunt of it all - along with my knees. It hurts to walk. But I just bought some new Toms so I am hoping that will help a bit. They are very comfortable.
But I am embracing everything the best I can as I reach the final stretch with this pregnancy. I admire all women that have gone through this multiple times. I can honestly say, one time is plenty for me! haha! We have decided after all of this that if we were to have one...it would just be a singleton. Yeah I am not doing this again. haha! As I am further along though, it's become so much more real. Especially when I feel her little feet, and her moving around. It's very surreal. It's very weird. And it's very, very emotional for me. Because I cannot believe in just 10 short weeks or less, I will finally be able to hold her in my arms and my journey will finally be over as a new one begins. But every day is still a day by day mentality. I am optimistic to think that way, but I remain grounded. Pregnancy is a tricky beast and can throw you curve balls at any given time. So I am counting my blessings that I have made it this far, and I am hopeful we will reach the finish line without hiccups. Fingers crossed!
xo
Monday, May 8, 2017
Hello Third Trimester and 28 Week Scan!
Well technically 28 weeks in 2 days...but close enough. So today is the day we had our scan! We hadn't seen her in 2 months and I was VERY nervous going in. Obviously I want everything to be perfect and know she is growing well! Well, we went in and.............everything is perfect! She is 2.8lbs and in the 46th percentile! Everything looks great and measuring right on time! She was in a very awkward position to get really good photos - so we didn't walk away with the best pics! But she did move her hand away from her face long enough to snap a few decent shots!
Nice butt shot! haha!
So she is going to look a lot like her father!! I can already tell! I cannot wait to meet her! <3
As for myself, I have been getting bigger. Here is the latest bump pic:
Yeah - definitely a lot bigger than last time I posted! I am having tons of acid reflux, backache, knee and joint aches, and have gained almost 20lbs. I still am having sleepless nights filled with uncomfortable positions, pee breaks and insomnia. I am also insanely emotional lately as well. I cry at anything it seems!! SOOOO not me. I have been getting a lot of Braxton Hicks Contractions as well. One time was concerning at 26 weeks because they were pretty regular at every 10 mins. I had a total of 5. 1 every 10 minutes. I finally called my doctor and she didn't seem too concerned. I went in the next day for a checkup and again - they didn't seem concerned and told me to just call again if I get 6+. It hasn't happened like that since then - although I still get at least 5 a day. Very sporadically though. I talked to my fetal medicine dr. about it and she seemed a little more concerned about them and even measured my cervix. My cervix is still at almost 4mm so it looks great. After that she just said that some women's uterus just get more irritable than others and contract more. So she thinks that's probably what's going on with me. But it's something I definitely need to monitor for any changes in patterns with them.
Other than that, I am doing good. We got the crib and changing table in over the weekend and I will start on her nursery in a few weeks. I am also starting to plan my baby shower. I never thought I would actually be comfortable with doing any of that stuff - and don't get me wrong - I am still a huge ball of nerves! But now that I have reached a milestone again, I am settling down a little bit. I have over 2 months to go. Just need to relax and try to just enjoy this time.
Oh....we are also officially going to announce the pregnancy tonight. I will upload our picture once we do so. (We still have to take it when we get home from work today). haha! It will be nice to finally let the cat out of the bag to the rest of the world!
Thanks for reading and Hope all is well out there!
xo
***update***
Here is the announcement picture! We didn't do anything super creative...but cute nonetheless! Cats officially out of the bag now and everyone is very excited!!
So she is going to look a lot like her father!! I can already tell! I cannot wait to meet her! <3
As for myself, I have been getting bigger. Here is the latest bump pic:
Yeah - definitely a lot bigger than last time I posted! I am having tons of acid reflux, backache, knee and joint aches, and have gained almost 20lbs. I still am having sleepless nights filled with uncomfortable positions, pee breaks and insomnia. I am also insanely emotional lately as well. I cry at anything it seems!! SOOOO not me. I have been getting a lot of Braxton Hicks Contractions as well. One time was concerning at 26 weeks because they were pretty regular at every 10 mins. I had a total of 5. 1 every 10 minutes. I finally called my doctor and she didn't seem too concerned. I went in the next day for a checkup and again - they didn't seem concerned and told me to just call again if I get 6+. It hasn't happened like that since then - although I still get at least 5 a day. Very sporadically though. I talked to my fetal medicine dr. about it and she seemed a little more concerned about them and even measured my cervix. My cervix is still at almost 4mm so it looks great. After that she just said that some women's uterus just get more irritable than others and contract more. So she thinks that's probably what's going on with me. But it's something I definitely need to monitor for any changes in patterns with them.
Other than that, I am doing good. We got the crib and changing table in over the weekend and I will start on her nursery in a few weeks. I am also starting to plan my baby shower. I never thought I would actually be comfortable with doing any of that stuff - and don't get me wrong - I am still a huge ball of nerves! But now that I have reached a milestone again, I am settling down a little bit. I have over 2 months to go. Just need to relax and try to just enjoy this time.
Oh....we are also officially going to announce the pregnancy tonight. I will upload our picture once we do so. (We still have to take it when we get home from work today). haha! It will be nice to finally let the cat out of the bag to the rest of the world!
Thanks for reading and Hope all is well out there!
xo
***update***
Here is the announcement picture! We didn't do anything super creative...but cute nonetheless! Cats officially out of the bag now and everyone is very excited!!
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
24 weeks!
Today I reached a milestone, 24 weeks! If God forbid anything were to happen, she could have a 20% chance of surviving at this point! So naturally, I am finding myself slightly more at ease as the time progresses. Slightly. haha.
Yesterday I had my Glucose test. I should get those results in a couple of days. Hope that all is well with that and have it be one less thing to worry about. My next appointments are in 4 weeks. It will be the 28 week checkup with the Maternal Fetal Medicine to measure her growth and another standard checkup with my OBGYN. So I am hoping for a relaxing and easy 4 weeks leading up to the next appointments.
Things with me are going good as can be expected in pregnancy. I don't sleep well, my joints and knees ache, I get restless leg syndrome often before bed, the acid reflux sucks, and I wake up to pee every 2 hours at night. But other than that, I feel great! haha! I feel her moving around a lot more frequent now. She is now around my midsection and bounces from one end of my tummy to the other. She is going to definitely be a handful! haha!
Here is a 24 week bump shot:
So yeah, definitely rounding out there! (pardon the lovenox bruising). I hate those damn shots!
Anyway, that's the latest for now! I will keep you posted on the Glucose results when I learn more!
xo
***UPDATE*** Got the Glucose test results and I am in normal range. No Gestational Diabetes for me! Woohoo! One less thing to worry about! :)
Yesterday I had my Glucose test. I should get those results in a couple of days. Hope that all is well with that and have it be one less thing to worry about. My next appointments are in 4 weeks. It will be the 28 week checkup with the Maternal Fetal Medicine to measure her growth and another standard checkup with my OBGYN. So I am hoping for a relaxing and easy 4 weeks leading up to the next appointments.
Things with me are going good as can be expected in pregnancy. I don't sleep well, my joints and knees ache, I get restless leg syndrome often before bed, the acid reflux sucks, and I wake up to pee every 2 hours at night. But other than that, I feel great! haha! I feel her moving around a lot more frequent now. She is now around my midsection and bounces from one end of my tummy to the other. She is going to definitely be a handful! haha!
Here is a 24 week bump shot:
So yeah, definitely rounding out there! (pardon the lovenox bruising). I hate those damn shots!
Anyway, that's the latest for now! I will keep you posted on the Glucose results when I learn more!
xo
***UPDATE*** Got the Glucose test results and I am in normal range. No Gestational Diabetes for me! Woohoo! One less thing to worry about! :)
Tuesday, March 21, 2017
20 Weeks 6 days
Today we had our 20 week anomaly scan even though I am a day shy of 21 weeks. I am thrillllledd to say that everything went perfectly! She is measuring right on time, and just looks great! Her heart, brain, organs, limbs, spine, everything were all perfect! The doctor said she was extremely happy and couldn't ask for better results. She is very confident that I will see this baby to term.
They measured my cervix and it's long and closed so no signs of any preterm labor on the horizon. Very relieving. I feel I can KIND OF breathe a sigh of relief a bit now that all of the major scans are out of the way now. The next scans are just a checking in on ya kinda thing and should only last like 15 mins she said. So the next one will be May 8th and I should be about 28 weeks then. :)
The ultrasound tech took many pics but after reviewing them...none of them were really great...haha! You can hardly make out what anything was. Especially the 3D image she did...it just looked like a blob. Disappointing but oh well. She did get a great profile pic which I will show below - as well as a cute image of her legs. So I am happy about that!
They measured my cervix and it's long and closed so no signs of any preterm labor on the horizon. Very relieving. I feel I can KIND OF breathe a sigh of relief a bit now that all of the major scans are out of the way now. The next scans are just a checking in on ya kinda thing and should only last like 15 mins she said. So the next one will be May 8th and I should be about 28 weeks then. :)
The ultrasound tech took many pics but after reviewing them...none of them were really great...haha! You can hardly make out what anything was. Especially the 3D image she did...it just looked like a blob. Disappointing but oh well. She did get a great profile pic which I will show below - as well as a cute image of her legs. So I am happy about that!
Is that not the cutest profile pic ever!!! I fall more and more in love with her every time I see her! I cannot wait to meet her! Gonna be weird not seeing her on the big screen for almost 2 months! I've sort of gotten used to these monthly appts. But I'm not keen on constant ultrasounds - so I will let her have a little break from them too! haha
Next appt for me is the Glucose test at my OBGYN. Hopefully all goes well there and my sugar levels are normal. We shall see!
Well that's all for now! Happy my little baby bean is growing and healthy! Now just keep cooking for another 4 months!!! haha!!
xo
Thursday, March 16, 2017
Halfway Mark! 20 Weeks!!
I can't believe I have reached the halfway milestone! It blows my mind! I am still a nervous nelly about everything but as time goes on...I'm starting to relax a tad bit more. Especially now that I am feeling her move on an every day basis now. That is SO comforting to me. I haven't even had to use the doppler since that is enough for me to know she is still kicking in there (literally).
I had my regular appt with my OBGYN the other day, and it went really well! They pass me around each visit to different doctors because they want me to be familiar with everyone. That way if I go into labor and one of them is on call, I have a familiar face to see. Well this time it was a male doctor - first male gyno I've ever seen. (I tend to stick with the ladies since, well, they can relate more and obviously less awkward). Anyway, he was super nice, professional and made me feel very comfortable. We listened to baby, and she sounded great. He had to chase her around my belly because she was bouncing all over! She's an active one, I tell ya! We are going to have our hands full!
We discussed everything as far as medications, and I told him I have decided to stay on the prednisone. I'd rather have that extra something to fight inflammation than risk anything at this point. I have done as much research as I can about it, and since I am going to be on a very low dose - I shouldn't have any bad effects for myself or baby. I am not crazy about staying on it - but I feel more comfortable knowing I am doing everything I can to keep my inflammation issues at bay.
Anyway, we have our "20" week scan (even though I will be almost 21 weeks then) on Tuesday the 21st. I am not thrilled with doing all of these ultrasounds because I hear it could be bad to constantly do ultrasounds. They link everything to Autism these days and this is one of them. So I'm not sure if I am a believer in that or not - but it does plant a seed in your head and make you paranoid. Anyway, we are going to make sure she's growing nicely and check her heart and whatnot. Hopefully all is ok in there! I feel her kick so much now that I definitely know she has grown! haha!
Speaking of grown, here is a 20 week belly shot. Not much different from the last belly shot, but figured I would include the milestone pic anyway! ;)
I had my regular appt with my OBGYN the other day, and it went really well! They pass me around each visit to different doctors because they want me to be familiar with everyone. That way if I go into labor and one of them is on call, I have a familiar face to see. Well this time it was a male doctor - first male gyno I've ever seen. (I tend to stick with the ladies since, well, they can relate more and obviously less awkward). Anyway, he was super nice, professional and made me feel very comfortable. We listened to baby, and she sounded great. He had to chase her around my belly because she was bouncing all over! She's an active one, I tell ya! We are going to have our hands full!
We discussed everything as far as medications, and I told him I have decided to stay on the prednisone. I'd rather have that extra something to fight inflammation than risk anything at this point. I have done as much research as I can about it, and since I am going to be on a very low dose - I shouldn't have any bad effects for myself or baby. I am not crazy about staying on it - but I feel more comfortable knowing I am doing everything I can to keep my inflammation issues at bay.
Anyway, we have our "20" week scan (even though I will be almost 21 weeks then) on Tuesday the 21st. I am not thrilled with doing all of these ultrasounds because I hear it could be bad to constantly do ultrasounds. They link everything to Autism these days and this is one of them. So I'm not sure if I am a believer in that or not - but it does plant a seed in your head and make you paranoid. Anyway, we are going to make sure she's growing nicely and check her heart and whatnot. Hopefully all is ok in there! I feel her kick so much now that I definitely know she has grown! haha!
Speaking of grown, here is a 20 week belly shot. Not much different from the last belly shot, but figured I would include the milestone pic anyway! ;)
I am in desperate need of some maternity clothes now since I am outgrowing all of my shirts and pants! It also better start warming up soon, since I am having trouble zipping up my winter coat now! haha!
Anyway, other than the heartburn/indigestion and the insomnia at nights, I'm feeling pretty damn good! I have gained energy back and I am feeling slightly like my old self again! I will touch base again after Tuesdays appt! Fingers crossed all goes well!
xo
Wednesday, March 8, 2017
19 Weeks!
1 more week til I'm halfway there! Things are still going great so far...I almost feel like I am jinxing myself writing about it right now. It's so scary as time progresses, I just want to fast forward to August so I can stop worrying! But like I said, so far so good so just trying to relax and enjoy as much as possible.
I was complaining to my sister yesterday that I still haven't felt much movement from Ava yet. I have felt things which I thought was her, but nothing so defined to where I could differentiate between her or gas. haha! Thank God for the doppler which allows me to check in on her from time to time, otherwise I would be a complete nut about it. BUT last night, and much of yesterday I finally felt movement!! And I was certain it was her. Lots of little pokes and wriggling around. It's a very weird, yet comforting feeling. I hope I start feeling her now a lot more frequent to help ease my mind.
I have some appointments coming up, one just a standard check up with my obgyn on the 13th and another (the big one) the 20 week scan on the 21st. Although I will be closer to 21 weeks at that time. I just pray that she is happy and healthy in there. I think if I can make it to 24 weeks I will be able to breathe a little bit easier about the whole thing. (that's when premies have a chance at survival).
But enough of that worry talk...here is a recent bump pic! Definitely looking pregnant now and I am still getting adjusted to my ever changing body! It's really surreal!
I am definitely out of the morning sickness phase, gaining my energy back and am hungrier than a hippo these days. I feel like I never stop eating!! Funny thing about my cravings - I get a STRONG craving for something...have it for about a week straight, then don't think twice about it again. So bizarre! haha! I'm sure I am driving my husband crazy with the endless changes in diet! lol
Anyway, that's all for now!
xo
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