32 Weeks!

Another milestone down! At this point of the pregnancy, she will do extremely well if she were to be born from now til here on out! Very relieving to have made it this far! I am getting bigger by the day it seems, and more and more tired. All normal pregnancy stuff. But everything still seems to be moving along as they should. I have been feeling a lot of pelvic pressure and get a lot of braxton hicks, which is always somewhat unsettling. But from what I read, all normal things.

 I am officially going off prednisone today and hydroxychloroquine. I have dwindled down to 2mg of prednisone over the past week and I feel I am ready to completely be off of it now. The hydroxy stays in your system for like 50 days after going off and I would like it to be out of my system by the time she is here so there are no issues with it being in my breastmilk. Even though they say that it doesn't cause harm - still would like to be off of it. Less drugs, the better. Still a little apprehensive coming off of them since I have been used to being on them for so long, but I am also excited to NOT be on steroids anymore!! I just hope I keep thriving without them. But at this point - I am comfortable enough to do without.

  We are starting to receive gifts from the registry and we are going to be officially setting up the nursery this weekend. Crazy to even think about! I keep having to pinch myself that this is all really happening! These 8 weeks are going to fly, but will still be the longest 8 weeks of my life all at once. I am anxious to meet her. She is so active in there, kicks away and even has the hiccups on occasion.

   Here is the latest 32 week bump pic! I think I might topple over if I get any bigger! haha!

                                                                       32 Weeks

So that's about it! Til next time! xo
                                                                   

Results.

****Update: I spoke with my dr. and she is going to up the ante to 20mg of prednisone daily. So that should hopefully help with the inflammation. She also again advised I do the IVIg treatment pending a positive preg test. I am considering it. I just don't want to fuck around this time. I am tired of going through this crap month after month. So I may just suck it up, go into debt and see if it makes a difference or not. We will see****



Well, not the news I was hoping to hear. Got my TNF results in and my levels are still up.

TNF: 37.0
IFN: 23.4

My IFN level is up too, so I don't know what that means. Guess more inflammation for me, yay.

This is why I didn't want to retest, because these levels stress me out. I wrote my doctor letting her know the results (I called the lab this morning to see if they were in). I know she probably is so irritated with me that I do my own work when it comes to this. But honestly, she should be happy - I'm essentially doing her job! lol. I do all of the research/work and she just authorizes the medication. If I sat and waited around for them to contact me with the results - I would be waiting until next week. My old nurse sarah would be kind enough to email me the results once they came in...but she no longer works in that office. Now I have a bitch nurse I have to deal with that won't do those things. I have to come into the office and meet with the dr. to discuss things I already know - on top of paying a $40 co pay. It's bullshit and I am really getting fed up with this office.

Anyway, hopefully my doctor will respond and give me a higher dosage of prenisone. Hopefully that will help with the inflammation issues I clearly have. I am really bummed that I have been on the hydroxychloroquine for 3 months now and it hasn't lowered my TNF yet. I was really hoping that this drug would be my cure for that - and to spare me more aggressive treatment such as humira (which I am not thrilled about taking since it can open the door for cancers and such) as well as the super expensive IVIg treatment. But now I'm thinking I might not be able to get off the hook with that.

  Anyway...I should be ovulating tonight. I got my round of Intralipids yesterday and I think I timed it perfectly this time around. We have been DTD all week and will go again tonight on onward until I am sure I ovulated. No messing around this cycle.

If I do happen to get pregnant and still miscarry - it's off to see Dr. Braverman, Reproductive Immunologist in NY. He is the top Immunologist in the country and many people across the world go to him. NY isn't too far away and it will be worth it to work with someone who claims to have an 80% success rate. I am eager to get this sorted and after a year of trying with my doctor - shit just isn't working with her. Well - maybe it will - it's to be determined how this month goes still. But if not...buh bye to her and that practice.

Anyway - tick tock goes the clock....hopefully this month will be our month and will be the start of a new beginning for us. I am going to keep positive despite the bad news of the levels today. Stress doesn't help matters...so I am going to try my best to not stress out. Easier said than done...

Blogging

I just read the most inspiring blog! It was almost like I am reliving her hellish nightmare because she went through the EXACT same thing I am going through!! Only she has a very happy ending!!! She had 5 miscarriages, diagnosed with auto-immune issues, took the same steps I'm taking to treat it (minus the LIT), took HYDROXYCHLORIQUINE which I pushed so hard to get and then BAM. Got pregnant and it stuck! Now she has a beautiful little girl!!

  I can only hope my path ends as similar as hers! I am praying for that positive outcome! I don't know what this cycle will bring. I don't know if I have been on the hydroxychloroquine long enough for it to really do it's job! I don't know if I am trying too soon and setting myself up for failure again. But what I do know is I can't stop trying. Her blog was called "try, try, try again" and it's so true! You cannot quit! You must gather the courage and strength to ultimately obtain your dream! I cannot say this drug will be my saving grace. I don't know when or if I will get my happy ending. I may still be in store for more heartbreak before I finally get there. But I won't give up.

My inspiration:

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/real-life-stories/kelly-moseley-mums-baby-joy-3030511

Post op appt/Dr. Switch

Today I went to my post op appt. Everything went as I expected - no endometriosis to be found and everything looked great in there. So I can officially cross that off the list of things. So before I get started with the appt. I had quite an interesting week. I have been pounding the pavement to find a doctor to prescribe me Plaquenil. (hydroxychloroquine). ((the drug I have been wanting my specialist to prescribe to me)). I knew she wasn't going to - so I contacted my primary care doctor about it. He took a step further than my specialist would - and actually researched it for me, however, he felt he couldn't prescribe me something on the basis of what I wanted to use it for (infertility) since he knew nothing about it. Which is understandable and at least he was willing to look into it for me which I appreciated.

  So I contacted my fertility specialist again (shot in the dark) attempt and she yet again shot me down. She suggested I see a rheumatologist and that she cannot help me in getting it. Ok. FINE. So I made an appt with a rheumatologist for the 9th of August. NOW. Today I went to my post op and talked with my doctor there. He is very nice, and actually listens to me and my concerns. I told him about plaquenil and stated the reasons why I felt it would benefit me. And guess what. HE is going to prescribe it to me!!!!! On top of that - he wants to care for my issues and wants me to entrust him in my pregnancy journey. He is not an immunologist - and isn't too familiar with how it relates to pregnancy loss - HOWEVER - he isn't opposed to giving me the right medication he feels will help suppress my immune system during pregnancy. So on top of the plaquenil, I will be on a low dose steroid which my fertility dr wanted to put me on anyway. We will retest the TNF levels in a month and see where we are at.

  FINALLY I found a doctor who understands and is willing to help me!! And thinks outside the box!! I couldn't be more thrilled! So I get to start this medication tonight!!! I am not saying this is going to be my miracle drug - but it's definitely worth a shot!!! And for the steroid and plaquenil - it cost me a total of $14!!! Sure beats the $2500 per shot of IVIg if it works!! God I hope it works!! It's my last ditch effort to try and do this without breaking my bank account. Praying for miracles over here!

  Anyway, so that's the latest and greatest! I will keep you posted on how it's all going! But woooohoooooooooooooo for the Plaquenil! Finally!!!!